During 太极拳 today, my breath and energy matched the red plant I stared at while training, and the yellow leaves above me as I stretched. I haven't noticed this sort of natural presence until now, when I am out of breath, when air transforms into need and meaning. "Not my song, but yours." I don't belong here, or anywhere else among this unnoticed beauty; nor doe anyone else. One day, maybe, when we can all rediscover stillness and let our lives blossom inward rather than spraying outward.
The more fulfilled and self-understanding I am on the inside, the lonelier relations get on the outside. This is one color of 道.
"By inconsistency and frivolity we stray from the Way and show ourselves to be beginners. In this we do much harm." -Hagakure
So much of this struggle is merely seeking to belong.
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